a whisper of yesterday's.

My voice is goneeeeeee! I can barely speak. No, fuck that, I can't speak at all. It takes so much effort to get a few words out. So I go around whispering everything, and damn do I sound like a freak.
And when I blow my nose? Sometimes blood comes out. And my throat feels like it has a million raw, red scratches and a wad of tissue stuck there.

To top that all off, I have no medication whatesoever. Yes, it's true. The doctor is staying in the house for a week and nope, no medicine.
My mum called an hour ago, from Nepal. She almost died laughing when she heard my 'voice', and now she's sitting in her hotel room crying and worrying and feeling angry because my father is chasing balls around a golf course in Sentosa and has not given me any medicine since I lost my voice a couple of days ago.

my family is brilliant.

I feel grossly sick but I don't want to stay at home. Urgh. I feel like going out and wandering around somewhere.

yes I'm restless again.
it's that kind of day again.
what's new.
I want to go out to a spot where there's sunshine, some shade and a breeze, sit down, listen to Freddie and read a book.

Just that when I'm out I can't order food, ask for directions or talk to people. haha.